Christmas Play List

Yep, it's that time of year again. Time to break out the Mo-tab and Mariah and listen to Christmas music 24/7. If you're crazy like me then this has already been going on for over a week now. The problem is that there is not an unlimited supply of great Christmas music out there...which becomes painfully obvious when you get in the car and turn on the "all Christmas" radio station to find that they're playing Mannheim Steamroller's "Deck the Halls" yet again. (Incidentally, what is with them...they play already overplayed Christmas songs on their casio keyboard with a disco beat and people buy millions of albums...am I only the only one doesn't get it?) And then there is the even more painful (and incredibly, even more overplayed) new "favorite" carol...The Christmas Shoes. I can't even think of it without cringing. If I hear this song blaring over the loud speaker in a store I will literally turn around and walk right back out. And I can say that in all honesty because it happened last year. Here are a few more songs I could do without:

Feliz Navidad by Jose Feliciano- If you wanna wish me a Merry Chirtmas then do it in English. For a real laugh, check out Celine Dion's version on her "These Are Special Times" album (no, that's not a Martha Stewart special on TV, it's actually the title of a song on Celine's album)...I'm pretty sure they speak French in Quebec, not Spanish.

Santa Can You Hear Me - No Britney, he cannot hear your nasaly whinny voice because he only listens to people who haven't been naughty.

Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time, Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time, Simply Having a Wonderful Christmas Time -AHHHHHHHHH! Not anymore thanks to that dumb song getting stuck in my head. I'm pretty sure this song is at least partly responsible for the increase in suicide rates during the holidays.


But, even though there are more than a few hiccups, there are still lots of great songs and albums out there, even if every album is mostly composed of new versions of the same old songs. Here are a few suggestions to break out of the Josh Groban and, heaven forbid, Clay Aiken mold.

1) Christmas Song by Dave Matthews band. Not exactly traditional, but I love it none the less.

2) Santa Baby by Everclear. This isn't the easiest song to find if you're into piracy, but for all you honest people out there you can buy it on itunes. I like the lyric change from a sable under the tree to a guitar...because fir was so 5 decades ago anyhow right. If you're not into rock band covers then at least let go of Madonna's disgusting version and go with Eartha Kitten or Marilyn.

3) Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas by Judy Garland. In this case, and many others, the original is the way to go. And by the way, the movie Meet Me in St. Louis that the song was written for is one that everyone should see.

4) Wintersong by Sarah Mclachlan. This album hasn't been around that long. The whole thing is to die for. I'm a big Sarah fan so I'm not exactly partial, but it's worth investing in. Wintersong is an original and isn't really about Christmas, but it's beautiful. My other favorite on the album is an old carol called In the Bleak Midwinter. So good.

5) God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen by Barenaked Ladies and Sarah Mclachlan- I know, I know, Sarah yet again. But this song is worth it, I promise.

6) Silent Night by Boys II Men. I know that it's kind of 1993 of me, but this is such a great acapella version.

7) Face of Love by Jewel. I love her whole album "Joy: A Holiday Collection" as well. It's fun and unique.

8) I Farted on Santa's Lap by The Little Stinkers. Probably one of the dumber songs I've ever heard, but I still love it...not as much as my sister Rachel. I know that you're thinking I'm a bad parent to be letting my kids listen to/sing a song like this, but just don't judge until you hear it. And it's not like I'm letting them listen to "Hanky the Christmas Poo"

9) River by Robert Downey Jr. Not really a Christmas song, but don't we all wish we had a river to skate away on once in a while. Like when we're standing in an hour long line at Target.

10) Cool Yule by Louis Armstrong. A seriously underrated Louis song.

There are too many more songs to list and so many more great albums: Christmas With the Rat Pack, Harry for the Holidays (an unfortunate title for Harry Connick's album, but some of the songs are great), Michael Buble's Let it Snow album, The Muppet Christmas Carol Soundtrack, Toby Keith's a Classic Christmas (just a little joke, I hate Toby Keith as much as the dixie chicks do). And although I joked about Josh Groban and Mariah Carey I really love their albums as well. If anyone wants to share their holiday music suggestions, I'd love to hear them.

Good Luck Elder Radford!

Yesterday we took Dan (I mean Elder Radford) to the MTC in Provo. It was completely depressing but I'm like a proud mama and I know he'll be a fabulous missionary. Although, that doesn't make it any easier to let him go! Orlando is lucky to have him and hey, I'm going to Disney world in 2 years!




Dan found it really amusing that Mom was crying so hard she couldn't put the tag on




Liza told the kids that Uncle Dan was going to teach Mickey the gospel. It was all fun and games till they had to say goodbye. This picture is a pretty good indication of how we were all feeling.


Seriously un-fun. A few days before Dan left Shayla burst into tears and said, "It's just hard for me to understand why he wants to go!"

I'm Thankful for...(the shallow version)

I'm thankful for...

...my red patent leather Guess high heels...and also my other 58 pairs of strappy dress shoes (clearly I have an problem).

...whoever had the bright idea to put television shows on DVD so that I could watch The Office while I'm folding laundry (season 2 is my favorite).

...all the people who, despite years of evidence to the contrary, still think it's a great idea to go on a reality TV show (so that I can laugh my head off at people embarrassing themselves on national television).

...disney movies, not just because I love them but because my kids do, and that means 85 minutes of time I get to spend messing around on my guitar (give or take).

...the website www.humorfeed.com, because sarcasm is my favorite form of humor and this web site is full of it (pun intended).

...my ipod (because other wise cleaning my house would be almost unbearable).

...those little mini doughnuts with cinnamon and sugar that you can buy on Pier 39...and that if you save the bags they will refill them for really cheap (because one bag full of fat calories is just not enough).

...the movie Tommy Boy because when I'm in a bad mood I can replay scenes of it in my head and it's an instant mood boost ("TOMMY: Hey, did you hear I finally graduated? RICHARD: Yah, and just a shade under a decade too, alright. TOMMY: You know, a lot of people go to college for 7 years. RICHARD: I know. They're called Doctors.")

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPLDCrwt1f4

Sweet Rims

I know, it's like the baddest toyota on the planet. I'm not sure why you're flashing a peace sign, Jocelyn...I thought westside was more appropriate. You'd think we would have been nervous that the owners would come out and see us making fun of their car. We weren't, but only because we were worried about someone else coming after us. We were in line to pay for parking and Michelle was talking about the whole high school "most likely to" voting nonsense to which she rightfully added "IT WAS SO GAY!" Jocelyn started to squirm and shoot us that look like "please stop talking NOW" because the two women holding hands behind us were visably unimpressed with Michelle's comment. A few minutes after the car picture we heard someone yelling at us in the parking garage and were sure we were in for at least a verbal thrashing. Then we realized it was Rocia and Megan who were yelling about how Rocia's van had mysteriously disappeared on them and was definitely not where they left it...I really hate when vehicles up and move somewhere else on their own!

Thank you Garth

I have issues with country music. Some of it I love, some of it I despise. Take this year for example: Taylor Swift? 17-year-old prodigy who writes her own music, plays her own guitar (the same one as mine by the way), and puts out a killer album with not one great song on it, but like 10 great songs. Love her. Brad Paisley? Overrated and far too twangy. His album was all about his obsession with 2 things: cars and his own adolescence. The single "Online" gets my vote for worst song of the year. Then there are those artists who ruin a good album with one bad song (Carrie Underwood)...any guesses on which song ruined the album? Maybe the one that belongs on a really bad evangelical broadcast. I know what some of you are thinking "but I loved that song"...I don't care; the title itself is cheesy enough make the rest of the song obsolete. And don't even get me started on Martina McBride who has a great voice, but insists on making each album a public service announcement that explores every depressing aspect of domestic violence (usually disguised by a catchy beat)...I love how on the 4th of July they play "Independence Day" over and over like it's some uplifting song about freedom. Anyhow, one person who I can honestly say I've always loved is good old Garth. I did wonder what the heck was going on during the Chris Gaines fiasco. And also, there was some weirdness when he and Tricia finally got together (like when they got married he had his daughters wear wedding dresses and veils too). Weird and also slightly creepy. But it seems every few years he has a random single that reminds everyone of how he became an icon in the first place. I'm in love with his most recent single "More than a Memory"...I love it almost as much as I love "She's Every Woman". Garth can pick a great song even if he can't really write them. The lyrics are simple but haunting "When you find the things to do not to fall asleep, cause you know she's waiting in your dreams." Thank you Garth for recharging my country batteries.

Gordo Taqueria vs. Nick's Crappy, I mean Crispy Tacos

The more SF people I talk to about Mexican food the more I realize it all boils down to one thing...Gordo's vs Nick's Crispy Tacos. You are either a fan of Gordo or a fan of Nick, there is no room for fence sitting. I am a Gordo's person, which is really good news for me since it is only a few blocks away, while Nick's is a whole 3 miles away (it doesn't seem like a lot, but in the city that translates into 25 minutes at least by the time you find parking over there). I will give Nick props for the Guacamole and sour cream, and I will also admit that it is probably cleaner over there even if the decor is totally lame (it reminds me of some sort of indian strip club). However, I don't appreciate that Nick's charges like 5 bucks for chips and salsa. It's also very ironic that they actually put "crispy taco" in their name because their tacos are soggy. Just admit it Jocelyn, they totally are. The reality is that even though Gordo's looks a little less appealing, they actually sell Mexican food there...which is a really good thing when you want Mexican food. So go to Gordo's and get a Chicken Quesidilla with everything on it (which pretty much turns it into a burrito that has melted cheese and a crispy tortilla) and it will only cost you 5 dollars. I do have to say though, that there is no Mexican food in SF (or all of Califorina, Utah, and Idaho) that can compare to the hole-in-the wall places in AZ. If you're ever in Mesa, go to Tia Rosa's or Gecko Grill. Just be prepared to crave it for the rest of your life and never be able to have it because you don't live there.

Time Flies when you're having fun

On Saturday, our little Shayla turned 5...





...I can't even wrap my brain around it because the time has gone by so fast!


Shayla really wanted to go to Chuck E. Cheese for her party which I was pumped about because it meant we weren't having the party at my house which meant I didn't have to clean a dang thing...I try and avoid that whenever possible. All morning I looked around the disaster area known as my living room and thought "It's so great! No one will ever know!" So we took Uncle Dan to the airport, ran some last minute errands, and ended up in San Bruno (which is where the nearest Chuck E. Cheese happened to be). I don't know if anyone else is aware of this, but apparently the Chuck E. Cheese in San Bruno is actually south of the border...who knew? I mean I was under the impression it was still in Northern California.

It was a gigantic nightmare. There wasn't even room to breath let alone play ghetto arcade games and eat overpriced (mediocre at best) pizza. I called all the party goers as fast as I could to warn them not to come clear down there, at least not without their passports, but I was too late for some of them (I'm really sorry about that...you know who you are). We stuck it out for about a half hour and then went back to my house.... you know, the disaster area that no one was supposed to see. Lucky for me I have good friends who love me anyway and even helped clear away some of the debris so we could actually have a party. It all turned out great in the end. Shayla had way too many presents as usual, and opened them in record time. I didn't make a cake this year, but I did Shaylaize the Costco sheet cake by putting plastic horses on the balloons...whatever works right? Thank you all you good sports who drove clear down only to turn right back around. And thank you Nana, Poppie, Grandma and Grandpa for all the presents...I have hardly any Shayla Christmas shopping to do because I saved a bunch of the presents we were going to give her!





I think this picture sums up the Chuck E. Cheese fiasco pretty well



Anyone who knows Shay very well knows she is obsessed with Animals. I swear she can understand them...it's totally bizarre. Anyhow, not a day goes by that she doesn't ask for a pet and I don't say "after dental school". But she got four gold fish from a birthday party two weeks ago and was ecstatic. Three died within 48 hours. One was very resilient, but bit the dust after Shayla gave it cinnamon and sugar to eat for breakfast (or maybe it was because Kyler thought it needed toys and put several small stuffed animals in the tiny fish bowl). She was pretty depressed so we got her a small aquarium for her birthday and Zach took her to Petco after her party to pick out the fish. Unfortunately, the fish in the picture are no longer with us. They only lasted a few hours. I realize you all think I must be the culprit here, but we did have some goldfish that lived for a couple years so I do know somewhat what I'm doing. Today we're off to the pet store again, and these ones had better survive.